Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
We left the knife in your bed.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
