your parents love me but you hate me
Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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