My brain says no but my pants say off.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i will never coherently bang her
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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