They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
even my farts smell like vagina
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.