Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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