I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
