I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
