You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Randomize
