I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
