How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
