I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
