i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize
