omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.