so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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