I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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