Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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