I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize