My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Even my vagina gasped.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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