About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize