We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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