You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
