More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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