the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I believe in your delicious
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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