I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
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