You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Randomize
