i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize