I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
