After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
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just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
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It's like a toaster oven for my penis
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox