We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
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BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked