Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize