"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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