the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
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