this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.