so explain again why im purple
no
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
this just has baby written all over it
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
