dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
