does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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