Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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