To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.