i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize