do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize