It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
