i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
