I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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