I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
