So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
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