Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
either way he was missing a nipple.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
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