Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
