In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
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