Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
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