Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
