i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Vodka?
Forever.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
